Monday, February 27, 2012

When It Counts.

My heart broke a little more with each tear that streamed down her face. 
Was I responsible for every one? No, I don't think so...but it sure felt like it in the moment. 

When it's easier to walk away, but you stay. 
When everything in you says to keep quiet, keep bottled up, but you let the words fall out of your mouth, no matter how terrifying.
When you drop the mask and just hope like hell the other person doesn't turn and run. 
When you stop punishing people in your present for things others did in the past. 
When you miss the mark and have to ask for forgiveness. 
The difficult and uncomfortable conversations.
Standing up for each other. 
The tears. 
Honesty, even when it hurts. 
Loving each other through it, all of it. 

That's when it counts. 

Friday, February 24, 2012

Some days they creep back in, the memories. 
I guess it's more accurate to say they creep back up, to the forefront of my mind. 
They are always with me. 

I close my eyes and I'm back there. 
the water
our crew
the smell of the salty air
the warmth of the sun
coolness from the metal canoe carrying me
sore muscles

Sometimes the memories return as reminders of the greatest adventure, to momentarily quench that unceasing desire for adventure, to run and not look back. 
Sometimes as gentle reminders of lessons learned. 
Sometimes they just sneak up and provide a quiet moment of happiness. 

Today, well, today they quietly whisper, "Be here now." 

to serve, to strive, and not to yield 

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